I’ve dealt with bullying during school, throughout the neighborhood I grew up in, with family members, and friends along with strangers also. I understand there is a pecking order in all groups of friends. You are either, next to number one or next to last. I’ve been in a Pecking Order group. I have also received nasty notes from friends telling me I was no longer included or telling me that I had lied about something. When I would confront the so-called friend, it became a fight either words thrown or fist fighting. This was back in the early eighties. Why were fists thrown? The Pecking Order leader convinced those of us lower on the Pecking Order list this was the way to solve the problem. Now, this was back in the eighties also. After the first two fights, I finally gave up on the group of friends and found myself alone. Why? Well, the Pecking Order group had told lies about me, making it hard for me to make friends and trust people. To this day I have very very few friends or if any. Since those days I ahve always set myself away from drame, nagging, blaming and Pecking Order.
Being bullied while in school, in the neighborhood I grew up in makes it hard to make friends, friends I can trust. I’d love to have friends that I could have those good hard laughs with, friends I could cry and vent to, too. For me, I like to hang out by myself or stay home. Staying at home can become very depressing and dark. I try to find a good book or hobbies to do from home. I love doing genealogy, which I concerned that meeting tons of new people, which I have found my way into a good group of genealogy people. We help one another we have even laughed at each other for silly mistakes. I need to correct myself about having friends. I do have friends they are either far or near. We enjoy each other’s company. I believe the farthest I have friends through genealogy are living California.
The truth about bullying, it doesn’t stop when you are an adult. It can be even worse. Adult Pecking Order yes I’ve been in that group also. More so in a working field. There has to be the Pecking Boss, then down to the lowest in the order. I’ve had to stand up for myself, and end some friendships, and realize that I wasn’t the problem. It was those who felt like they were being left out. I do believe, that friendships can heal and come back together, but not under a Pecking Order. If I want to be Pecked on, I can do that myself. I’m pretty darn good at pecking at all the flaws I have. I’m not trying to sound like I’m perfect, because I’m not. I’ve said things, and turn around and kick myself because I could have used other words. I believe we all have been in this boat.
If you’re feeling Bullied get help, reach out to someone to help you get the help you need. Please don’t wait until you are Pecked to Pieces. Or you are too afraid to ask for help. Find that person you trust, the one you can cry to, vent to, and let them help you. You MATTER, you may not know me, But YOU MATTER. I had been told one time, What Matters is who you Matter too. I have to remind myself of this all the time.
Here are some outlets: